February 8, 2011
2:57 AM
Dream Catcher
My dreams are weird... does that mean I'm weird too? Maybe I'm not being weird enough in daily life, so unconsciously, my dreams are telling me to be weirder. They've only started recently though, just around the time I arrived in Japan. Dreams before that were sporadic, and even then, insignificant. So why now?
One of them has me as a shinigami running around hunting stuff. I can't see the significance in this. Technically I've done that in real life(sort of..?), but thats besides the point. Bleh.
Another has me back in army. Faced with superiors, telling you to do this, do that, you don't have any other options but to follow the orders down to the word. Being stuck with that feeling of helplessness was distressing to say the least. Although this is a thing of the past, I have a feeling that this won't be the last I see of it.
And finally the last of which I can recall. I'm back in school, facing the crappy grades I always used to get. It had always left a sense of insecurity within me throughout the years. Like how my parents always preached to me, grades are the only things that can get you anywhere. Perhaps that feeling was what led me down a vicious cycle?
Also taking into account the countless dreams I've forgotten.. although the random dreams remain random, some of these dreams seem to be trying to convey something to me, and I can only shoot blind guesses back. Am I to embrace these feelings of insecurity, for they are what makes me human, or should I be striving never again to be in such a position?